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Tuesday, January 10, 2012

Waiting on the Man to change


I tweeted something yesterday that made oomf (I now know that means “one of my followers” lol) bring up a very good point. I said, “Isn’t the south supposed to be the home of the gentlemen? I guess they all moved.” He said that women aren’t looking for that anymore. Sad but true. Women have lowered their standards and as a result, these men or boys…let’s just say males, see no point in doing the extra. Extra as in being respectful, loyal, faithful, and so on. I’ve touched on that before so I’m not going in on that now.

There are men out there that are good. Gentlemen still do exist but we don’t see them because we as females spend all our time trying to change a dog into a man. It’s not possible and time shouldn’t be wasted on doing so. Contrary to popular belief, it doesn’t matter how good the pussy is. If a man isn’t ready to settle down…he’s not going to. If a man isn’t ready to be faithful and focus on one woman…he’s not going to. If a man isn’t ready to trust or believe there are good women out there…he’s not going to, period. Now I’m not saying you can’t be the inspiration behind a changed man or that you can’t be that last push he needed over the edge because that is very possible. But don’t think his changes are completely based on you.

 I woke up from a nap, went to my phone to check twitter, and the first thing I see is a tweet from a guy I used to talk to… a guy I really liked at one point actually. It said “there are NO BITCHES at my school, smh” another tweet said “I will share any girl except my main.” There was one other ignorant tweet but I can’t remember what it said. Now at first I was like wow, I really dodged a bullet with this guy, I thought I knew him. Then I realized I DID know him. Which is why what we had never amounted to anything. I knew he wasn’t going to be faithful, I knew he wasn’t going to trust me, and I sure as hell knew I was just another “bitch” in his contacts. A part of a team. That’s why I walked away, removed him from my life. He truly does have potential to be a good guy, I saw that in him too…but am I going to sit here and spend all my time and energy trying to bring that out of him? Hell naw! He is not ready to be that man and it doesn’t matter what I do, or how good I am to him…he won’t change until he is ready. Now some women have that “oh if I stick around long enough, something will change eventually” mentality. Which may be true, but why sit waiting for this man to change when there are plenty of men out there who have already gone through these changes? Men who have grown up into the mature, respectful, loving men they are supposed to be and now they’re just waiting on a good woman to treat right. But here you are stuck on this fool that you that you think you can change. I’m sorry but I have no time or patience for that. You not ready to be “tied down”, “Smash, no cuffin” and all that good stuff, that’s great! Do you! Just don’t expect me to be in your life while you doing it. Women…up your standards. No need for long ass lists but…can we at least not settle for a part of the team over being the one and only? Can we at least not be okay with being called bitches? Can we at least know what we’re worth?
“Who can find a virtuous woman? For her price is far above rubies.” (Proverbs 31:10)

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